Don’t freak out. This isn’t a personal announcement. The last time I was pregnant, Bill Clinton was President and figure skaters Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding had recently become ex-friends, so do the math. This probably isn’t about me.
This is about the peculiar tendency I’ve noticed in recent years in which expecting couples no longer declare their pending parenthood by saying, “we’re having a baby.” Instead, they use the odd and clearly debatable words, “we’re pregnant.”
I don’t get it. Obviously, one half of every parental equation is actually pregnant, and the other half played an important facilitator role, but according to the literal definition and physical manifestation of the word, both mom and dad are NOT pregnant.
It’s not that big a deal. Maybe this small semantic shift is really a demonstration of fatherly empathy. That’s nice. But every time I read or hear someone say “WE’RE pregnant,” I guffaw. I can’t help myself. It feels silly.
I guess Mila Kunis agrees with me because she once appeared on Jimmy Kimmel and said she had a special message for soon-to-be fathers:
“Stop saying, ‘We’re pregnant.’ You’re not pregnant! Do you have to squeeze a watermelon-sized person out of your lady-hole? No. Are you crying alone in your car listening to a stupid Bette Midler song? No. When you wake up and throw up is it because you’re nurturing a human life? No.”
Mila Kunis may be too young to remember when Lucy Ricardo was pregnant, but I’m not. I’m old enough to remember how much I loved watching I Love Lucy reruns as a kid. During the holidays, I enjoyed watching an I Love Lucy special, which included the famous segment where Lucy tells Ricky that she’s “enceinte” when she goes to the nightclub and writes an anonymous note requesting him to sing “We’re Having a Baby.”
It’s so sweet, it’s hard to believe that 60 years ago, CBS network executives considered it scandalous and wouldn’t let them say the word “pregnant” on air. So when an unsuspecting Ricky was wandering through the nightclub audience looking for the blessed couple, the scene would never have gotten past TV censors if he sang “we’re pregnant” lyrics.
Besides that, the episode would have lost its emotional punch.
So take a step back. Forget the “we’re pregnant” stuff, because “we’re” not. Ever. That’s okay. Since the dawn of time, people have always been savvy enough to know who is or isn’t the pregnant one, so skip the pretense.
If you ARE pregnant, congratulations, and if you and your mate want to make a happy announcement to your friends and family, maybe you should buy I Love Lucy on DVD and let Ricky Ricardo sing it for you.
We’re having a baby, my baby and me…
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photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/36641129@N07/20150325674″>Megan (40)</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/”>(license)</a>